New Year, New Rules

It's New Year's Eve. Not my favorite night. I am not sure why but I weep every New Year's Eve as the clock strikes midnight. We've had intimate parties at our home the last two years. Everyone was home. Lots of great friends over. That didn't happen this year for a variety of reasons. Jamie wasn't happy. He seriously was picking fights all day today. I knew why but he couldn't help himself.

Tonight we had dinner as a family with a guest at our favorite restaurant, Spuntinos. We shared a glass of cheer with Joe.  Then I had to say good night and Happy New Year to my gorgeous, handsome first born son as he headed off to a party/sleepover with a great family.

We have reached that stage. The baby birds are leaving the nest. It's a natural progression. I prepared my husband over the last couple of days. I told him these are the things he should be doing. He's in good hands, he's with his friends. He works hard. He deserves it.

My head knows that. My heart didn't. I usually am weeping at midnight. Tonight it started at 8:30 as he left for the party. He asked me if I was OK, I couldn't even speak. I choked out a few words. I'm OK. Happy New Year. I love you.

Jamie came home and said James wished me Happy New Year and gave me a big kiss and a hug. Did you tell him to do that? I just waved him off. I couldn't answer him. I did not tell him to say anything to his dad. My tears and inability to speak may have tipped him off to the fact that we were adjusting to his newfound status.

It's my first New Year's Eve without my son in fifteen years. I get him back tomorrow morning so I consider myself lucky. It's an adjustment period for all of us. We'll get through it.

Thanks for reading my blog. Thanks for the feedback and for taking the time to be part of my life. Happy New Year, everyone. In the words of my friend, Ben, Buon Anno a tutti 2012.